While she was sitting on the toilet naked with massive amount of scarred flesh spilling over the toilet seat and her long, stringy, reddish graying hair parted in the middle wisping her sagging breasts, she informed me in a deep brogue "Next time my sheets are wet just leave them on the bed to dry. I don't have enough sheets to be changing them all the time"
"Really? Aren't you concerned about the smell?"
"No, it drys."
I wanted to argue with her. Her apartment does smell. The urine stench smells stronger than lemon scented ammonia. I'm grateful for a warm day when I can open the window to air out the room. As I was holding a small plastic bag for her to dump her soiled undergarment into, I clenched my jaw and replied "I never heard of not changing sheets when they were wet." I didn't wait for a reply as I tied the bag tightly to keep the stench in and deposited it in the garbage can.
She lifted herself off the toilet teetering on the rails of the extra large commode. Her thin arms, mottled with black and blue blood spots looked as if they were thin toothpicks that might snap any moment holding up a quarter ton of weight. I could feel the pain of her knees as she winced taking three steps to the bathtub and situating her immense behind on the plastic tub seat that barely supports her. She was able to lift her left foot into the two foot high tub and I heaved her right foot over the edge so she could get her daily shower.
I welcomed the smell of the Head and Shoulders shampoo and the pear scented body soap as I washed her hair and scrubbed her back. When I was first contemplating caring for the elderly, I knew dealing with unpleasant odors would be my biggest obstacle. A friend who is an LPN suggested I carry a small jar of Vicks Vapor Rub in my pocket and put a dab in my nostrils whenever there was a strong odor. More importantly, she instructed "Make sure you help the patient maintain their dignity while you are caring for them." I found the latter advice much more useful as I don't remember to carry Vicks with me. After the shower she teetered back to the toilet seat covered with a towel and doused herself in camphor scented medicated body powder, leaving us both in a much better mood.
My next visit was to see a ninety one year old gentleman who I've become quite fond of. His three teenage grandchildren are home during the summer. The family is getting ready to leave for a vacation to the Virginia Beach at the end of the week. My patient will be spending the week at an assisted care facility a while the family is on vacation. I visit my patient on Mondays and Wednesdays. On Monday's visit when I asked him how he was feeling he told me in a rather melancholy voice "So So." He was a little sluggish, which I contributed to a busy weekend, but when he was still feeling that way on Wednesday I was concerned. He told me that he was trying not to let his family know how bad he was feeling as he didn't want to ruin their vacation. I could tell he wasn't feeling good as he gasped for air and coughed as he talked. His right food swelled to the size of a softball. Rather than focus on cleaning the house, I spent quite a bit of time visiting with Ernie. A Reader's Digest was lying on the end table so I picked it up and paged through it finding a few quotes to read out loud and then we did the Word Power together. After a lunch of pepperoni bread, salad and watermelon he hobbled back to his recliner to rest. I cleaned up the kitchen and clocked out. "Before you leave, I want to give you a hug, in case I don't see you again. I thought I was going to live to be one hundred, but I'm not going to make it."
Feeling tears well up in my eyes and not knowing if this might be the last time I see my friend, sing song words spilled out of my mouth. After the first verse he sang along.
" So long, it's been good to know you;
So long, it's been good to know you
So long, it's been good to know you.
This dusty old dust is a-gettin' my home,
And I got to be driftin' along."
After the song, with his finger on the button to raise his lift chair he said "What would we do without music?" As he came to a sitting position, I bent over and he wrapped his strong arms around me and gave me a larger than life bear hug. I kissed him on the cheek and told him he would be safe wherever he went.
"Take care" I said as I closed the back door of the house.
